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- spank that monkey \'spank-(')that-'mən-kē\ verb : to observe and discuss stupidity in an effort to better understand and find a solution to the problem that is stupidity. verb : what many visitors hope to do when visiting a web site containing the word "spank" in its title.
I have a dream. I have a dream that, someday, the Human Race will be rid of its stupidity and finally come together in peaceful unity to work together for the betterment of the entire Human Race, rather than for just a select few. I dream of a world where a white guy, a black guy, a Jew and a Muslim can all walk into a bar without it being a joke. I want to be able to watch the news and see people not taking advantage of one another, not killing each other and not hating and fearing one another. Yes, world peace is my goal, well, that or the total annihilation of Human kind before they get a chance to spread their stupidity any further. World peace would be pretty nifty, though.
Humanity has a monkey on its back. That monkey is Stupidity. It is time for us to spank this monkey into submission and learn to live our lives free from its influence!
Note: There is no pornography here. Sorry, you'll have to take your depravity somewhere else.
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| Compromised Security |
 You may notice the occasional bit of missing imagery here and there while visiting this site, especially in the Photo Gallery. That would be due to an unfortunate hack job performed upon this and a few other sites. Luckily, the databases do not appear to have been compromised. It was an attack that obliterated files. Now I must find time to reconstruct things as best as I can... |
· Spanky on May 08 2012 17:12:15 ·
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| Random Quotes |
I have recently added a new Random Quotes panel to the right side of the site's layout. At present, the random rotation of quotations consists of the following selections with more to be added as I deem them beneficial:
"It's not that I don't expect you to understand. I expect you to not understand." -Spanky
"Politicians are always interested in people. Not that this is always a virtue. Fleas are interested in dogs." -Patrick Jake O’Rourke
"Resolve to serve no more, and you are at once freed. I do not ask that you place hands upon the tyrant to topple him over, but simply that you support him no longer... |
· Spanky on October 13 2010 16:45:07
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| Random Rantables |
 In the course of Human events, one encounters many things that simply do not make good sense. One encounters things that waste time, money or some other currently scarce resource during times of difficulty. One finds oneself surrounded by nonsensical happenings that make sense only to those perpetrating them. We inevitably observe or even find ourselves falling victim to the idiocy of our brethren, our fellow Human Beings. Many of these things are not really worth a dedicated rant unto themselves as they would fit into a broader, more general rant on What in Hell is Wrong with People! and therefore be put aside and forgotten until these things creep up and aggravate us again. |
· Spanky on October 06 2010 13:04:58
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| Facebook Coalition Madness |
While playing around, I mean while doing serious research on the Internet for a rant I've been preoccupied with lately, it occurred to me that the world needs a hug. Humanity is in the rut it's in due in part to a missing sense of family and community. We really need to relearn how to share the love. Another thing that Humanity seems to need is a good sense of humor. I'm not saying that hugs and a few lame jokes are going to fix everything. However, major contributors to many of the woes in this world can be traced back to Humanity's loss of its sense of family and community and also to the fact that we take ourselves and our "causes" far too seriously.
Since Humanity seems to need a hug and a few laughs, I have decided to... |
· Spanky on September 07 2010 17:58:27
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| To Kill or Not to Kill... |
I have recently been asked if I believe in capital punishment. Yes, I believe in capital punishment. There is overwhelming evidence to prove that it does exist. However, all joking aside, it is not the easiest question to answer in a quick, idle conversation while driving down the road. I was forced to give a somewhat incomplete answer. In reality, I have three (3) answers. The first is always the sarcastic answer that I just gave. Yes, I believe that capital punishment does, in fact, exist. The other two answers are a bit more serious. One is based on actuality, the way the human world actually functions. It is the practical answer. The other is based on ideology, something that is rarely, if ever, practical.
Let us begin with the practical answer... |
· Spanky on August 21 2010 18:26:57
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| Broken Logic and Self-Righteous Delusions |
| I saw an image the other day that got my brain working on how many people seem to have broken logic. Maybe it is simply a matter of poor education, I don't know. The image was a spoof on the typical McDonald's sign, except that it was for the fictitious McVegan's and had the tag-line, "Billion and Billions Saved!" as opposed to served. Most vegans and many vegetarians are under the belief that they actually save animal lives by not eating animal products. By the same logic employed by these people, it would mean that I actually save your life every time I decide not to kill you. You're welcome, by the way. What's more, many of them tend to take a rather arrogant and pompous attitude about it, as though they are somehow better than other Human Beings. I am of the opinion that only an idiot... |
· Spanky on May 12 2010 17:08:19
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| Facebook, YouTube and More |
For those who may be unaware, I now present a few details concerning MySpace, Facebook, YouTube and other stuff as it relates to Spank That Monkey.
First, MySpace is crap. I used MySpace at the behest of a friend and it was OK for a little while. Then they did some funky update to make it all fancy and feature packed. Well, for me it lost its appeal, especially since I can no longer post a link to Spank That Monkey on my profile. The link keeps getting redirected to their spam warning page. Yes, I understand that it is to be expected, having the word Spank in the URL, but when combined with all the unnecessary "bells and whistles" that seem to only be an aggravation, it's enough for me to not like MySpace. Besides, I tend to prefer things be kept simple and clean... |
· Spanky on May 10 2010 16:52:19
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"Love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well. " -Vincent Van Gogh |
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I can't imagine why employers may have a problem with that email as a reference.